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HEALTH
The untold cost of caregiving: We all have a role to play

There is a memory from my medical school days that has stuck with me for decades. It’s one I’ve shared often and may have played a hand in my professional path. I came home for a medical school break and was enjoying a visit with my grandparents. We were sitting around the dining room table as we had many times, but this time was different. My grandfather’s Alzheimer’s disease symptoms had progressed since my last visit. He was a silent bystander to our family conversation that day, until, without warning, he slammed his fist on table with such force that everything shook. He stood up, agitated and upset, and ran out the front door. I followed him as he wandered the neighborhood. Eventually, I was able to bring him back inside. This was a marked change from the quiet, gentle man I had known. Although I would learn more about the progression of Alzheimer’s disease symptoms, that day, I was sure of one thing. I turned to my grandmother and said, “you can’t do this by yourself anymore.” She had been caring for my grandfather all on her own for many years with little support. Shortly after, my grandfather was moved to long-term care.

Nearly half of caregivers in the U.S. who provide care for an older adult do so for someone living with Alzheimer's disease or dementia. As America ages, these numbers are expected to grow exponentially. During my decades of experience working with people who live with Alzheimer’s disease I’ve seen first-hand the detrimental impact this condition has on the family and caregivers. The impact is especially hard on the “sandwich generation,” a term describing people who are navigating the trifecta of caring for a loved one, juggling a career, and the pressures of parenting children of their own. The complexities of care, financial burden, and human toll it takes for someone to care for people suffering from Alzheimer’s disease are staggering. Worse, these challenges go largely unnoticed and unsupported by resources in our communities.

Half of sandwich generation caregivers caring for loved ones with Alzheimer’s disease or dementia feel as though they are drowning and unprepared for the role, according to a new survey conducted by Wakefield Research and sponsored by Otsuka America Pharmaceutical. Nearly two-thirds (65%) of caregivers surveyed say that their role is more stressful than any job they’ve held in the past. They have paid a heavy price, with caregiving taking a toll on nearly every aspect of their lives, putting their finances, mental health, and jobs on the line. The impact is even greater among sandwich generation caregivers with 72% reporting they have had to cut back on spending for necessities such as food, tapping into retirement or personal savings, or cut back on their own medical care expenses.

Despite the heavy load they are carrying, two thirds (66%) of Alzheimer’s disease and dementia caregivers report feeling undervalued by society, believing society values career over caregiving.
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YOUR MARRIAGE

HOW TO HANDLE STRESS IN MARRIAGE

Most people struggle to manage their stresses in marriage effectively. And unmanaged stress in one spouse usually escalates stress in the other. But reactions can be complex.

Mandy* knew it would be a tense evening with her husband, John. His jaw was clenched, and he was in a cantankerous mood, which would lead to a stressful marriage moment.

“What’s wrong with you?” Mandy complained. “I had a hard day with the kids, and I don’t need your grumpy mood.”

“Try going through a day with my boss,” John snapped. “Besides, you’re always complaining about being tired, and you’re the one who wanted another kid. Why can’t I just come home to a wife who has some energy and is happy to see me?”

“Maybe if you came home with a smile and offered a little help, I’d be happy to see you,” Mandy said.

John’s eyes flashed with anger. Mandy could see him trying to hold back. If she kept going, if she said one more word

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FINANCE AND INVESTING TIPS FOR THE SANDWICH GENERATION

‘Sandwich Generation’ Caregiving Crimps Retirement Planning

Financial strains are holding back this generation of caregivers, but workplace benefit providers tout potential for employers to help with customized planning.

Recent research by Nationwide and the Alliance for Lifetime Income highlights financial pressures faced by the ‘sandwich’ generation of caregivers who are stuck between children and aging parents. However, separate findings from Morgan Stanley’s workplace division suggest that tailored workplace benefit plans can assist in staunching the financial pain and stress of this group.

According to the annual Nationwide Retirement Institute Long-Term Care survey, Americans are facing significant financial burdens to provide and pay for long-term care for themselves and their loved ones. The Nationwide survey, conducted from March 12 to April 2, gathered responses from 1,334 U.S. adults aged 28 and older with household incomes of $75,000 or more.

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^{YOUR KIDS}

Homeschooling isn’t for every family and comes with challenges, but we would do it again if we had to 

As parents, taking on the role of educator to homeschool one's kids can be overwhelming. Here's why this couple feels it's worth the investment and sacrifice.

Of all my childhood memories, the ones I hold closest to my heart are the times spent with my dad and elder brother after our Sunday swimming lessons where we would share snacks and laugh together. 

These moments were good, but they never lasted long. I always yearned to be able to spend more time with him. 

When my wife Diane and I had our first child, we decided that we never wanted our children to feel that sort of yearning. And so, even though we knew it would be a lot of work, we chose the path of homeschooling. 

Don’t get us wrong: Normal schools and textbooks are great. There’s nothing wrong with a conventional academic path; we just wanted something different for our kids. 

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CARING FOR PARENTS

Counselor explains why there's a disconnect between most elderly parents and their children

Janet's video focuses on the emotional neglect in the parent-child relationships of her generation.

BySuchitra B

June 3, 2024

Editor's note: This article was originally published on October 30, 2022. It has since been updated
 
Trigger warning: This article contains themes of emotional abuse and parental neglect that some readers may find distressing.

Many Generation X children have had a hard time with parents who were too busy or did not think their children's emotions were a big deal. Therefore, many children from the 1970s-80s era have grown up feeling a vacuum in terms of their emotional needs..

A Texas-based counselor, Janet Martinez, took to TikTok with a very important video on this issue, focusing on the emotional neglect in these parent-child relationships. Janet, who herself belongs to Generation X, reveals that the emotional neglect that her generation's parents have given them is very problematic, even if it was unavoidable. "In my generation, we were basically feral. We were allowed to, we sort of raised ourselves," she said.

read it here

YOUR JOB

60% of people who work multiple hourly jobs are women: ‘They will do what they have to do’.

Four years after the onset of the Covid-19 pandemic, women are back at work — and taking jobs or looking for them at a higher rate than they were before it started. In February 2020, 77% of women ages 25 to 54 participated in the labor force, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. In February 2024, 77.7% of women in that age group were participating. That’s nearing June 2023′s peak of 77.8%, the highest rate since 2007.

“Prime age women, so women between the ages of 25 and 54, are unequivocally driving the labor market recovery from the Covid recession,” says Lauren Bauer, a fellow in economic studies at the Brookings Institution and the associate director of its policy proposals initiative The Hamilton Project.

For a lot of women, reentering the labor force does not necessarily mean finding just one job. Scheduling software company Deputy recently analyzed 81,413,785 shifts of 420,219 hourly U.S. workers and found a rise in people taking on multiple gigs. “Our data showcases a substantial increase in poly-employment across Deputy platforms, more than doubling since 2021,” says Silvija Martincevic, CEO of Deputy.

And 60% of those taking on multiple roles are women. Here’s why experts think women are doubling up.
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